All marriages are performance based to some degree because we are all human.  However, we should never manipulate change in the other person just to have our needs met.  We need to minister and meet their needs and trust the changing to God.  Mark Merrill has some practical tips on breaking this cycle:

“Does this sound familiar to you?

“Honey, if you would just plan fun things for us to do, then I would spend more time with you.”

If you would spend more time with me, then I wouldn’t be so cranky.”

If you weren’t so cranky, then I would plan fun things for us to do.”

To break this cycle someone has to lead and in my opinion that should be the husband’s role.  Read More …

Categories: Marriage

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